I feel alive

I feel alive

So much
That my body tenses
Too much energy
Going through its veins
Muscles, tendons, flesh

So many movement
Inside
Outside
My heart jumps

Sweat covers my sleep
Tiredness can't get me
Sleepless I stay

I feel alive
So much
It feels unnatural
Guilt comes

And I laugh
To let it go

And I dance
To let it flow

Nothing to stop me

I am flying
On a thin line
That could break
Any time

I try not to look down
Back to suffocating
Back to tunnel vision
Back to suffering

Even if it hurts
To look straight up
My neck
My arms

Even if it scares
The heck
Out of me

I remember that before
I was dead

And today
I choose
To be alive